This is the 10th anniversary of the publication of my book
Learning At Home: A Mother’s Guide To Homeschooling, now in its third edition. (It’s also the year I turn 60.) How those ten years have flown! My children have found their
passions and are pursuing their careers. I’m doing the same. When I decided to publish my book, I didn’t know a lot about
computers or software. I learned how to use software programs as needed to set up my book. It’s been very satisfying to be
totally in charge of each edition of my book - to set the format, design, and cover and to be responsible for any and all
mistakes. The present edition – Newly Revised – has new material and a brand new cover. This edition is printed on demand,
which means I don’t have a huge pallet of books in my garage. Easier on my pocket book!
I can still remember the thrill
the first time someone wrote to me to tell me that my book had made a difference in her life. I am just as thrilled 10 years
later to hear from a reader that what I wrote made her more empowered or relieved her fears.
In 1998, Michael Pastore
wrote a book review for The Midwest Review of Books which made me glow. “There's a great compassion in these pages, from a
mother who loves her children and understands how to express this love. And huge chunks of that indefinable quality called
wisdom.” Who knew I was wise?
When I read through the book, which I do particularly closely when I am revising it for
a new edition, I am always struck anew by the fact that what I wrote reads well. This surprises me.
Underneath the almost 60-year-old woman, I am still that 8-year-old child trying to absorb a new language, not sure of spelling
or grammatical structure. Or the teenager who wrote for her high school English classes but never received any feedback to
say that what she had written was interesting, worthwhile, etc.
It amazes me how much my self-image is still
tied up with the image I formed of myself as a child and teenager. I think about my children’s images of themselves and wonder
how it will be for them when they are my age. Will their self-image have to do with their childhood years, their teen years?
Who were the evaluators of their abilities? I won’t be around to be told, but I am curious.
As I sort out what direction
I want to go in now, I come down to a few things that are important for me. These things fit into what I have done with my
life, and their roots are easy to see, but I am not sure that the plant could have been visible before my 60th birthday.
My
classes for parents and babies show me that I like teaching specific relationship strengthening skills to parents like songs
and fingerplays or how to massage a baby. I don’t like teaching methods of parenting as I always feel that I’ve come into
the middle of the story and don’t have the background to know what happened before I got there. So how can my suggestions
about parenting have validity? However, I do like sharing my perspective and encouraging people to think through their options.
Over the years, I’ve tried to find a parenting method that I could teach and feel comfortable with and have finally
accepted that I won’t find one. Parenting, mothering is so very individual. I do like coaching – offering moms my support
while they explore their hopes and dreams for their relationships with their children. My years of motherhood pay off here
because I have learned to listen and process what someone says. Women tell me that my observations and perspective often help
them to find new pathways or resolve old problems.
This skill is not easy to translate into a book, but I have been
working on it.
Mothering Matters – a workbook for inner exploration (the working title) will be a book with a number
of questions to encourage you to explore your hopes, dreams, fears, and realities about motherhood. My thoughts,
observations, and reflections will lead into the questions.
The book will be one that you can work on by yourself
or with a group of friends. There will be blank pages with lines for you to write in, photos illustrating points, and quotes
I’ve found helpful over the years as well as my thoughts about various topics that will hopefully lead to the reader’s inner
exploration. I’ve been working on this book for about 6 years – a long gestation period. I’d love to know if any of you, readers
of my homeschooling book or participants in my classes, would be interested in such a book. The topics covered include – motherhood
models, dealing with change, sleep, a look at what causes burnout, preventing burnout, inner conflict, and the joy children
bring into our lives.
The book won’t have answers – you have to find those yourself, but it will have a lot of questions
and it will have reflections about various issues. As I begin a new decade, I find questions to be much more interesting than
answers.
Please feel free to
email me with your comments or suggestions.
Cheers,
The beach can provide hours of fun – digging in the sand, pouring water, swimming and walking through shallow water and seeing
what’s there. A pail and shovel can provide hours of fun. Children develop all sorts of skills as they make sand castles,
construct buildings, tunnels, etc. As they play, they learn first hand about the properties of water and sand. 
You can listen to Off to The Sea, a song from my CD Brighten the Day – songs to celebrate the seasons
that we enjoyed singing together on our daily trip to Beaver Lake.